We all desire a loving relationship with a partner that will accept as completely and love us unconditionally.
But have you ever asked yourself, why do you desire this? Why do you need such relationship? Why do you need someone else to love and accept you?
Most people desire a relationship because they feel incomplete by themselves. They feel a lack of something and they believe someone who loves them will fill this void they feel.
But the truth is nobody can give you the love that you should give yourself. Nobody can make you feel complete if you don’t realize you are already complete, you don’t lack anything.
These misconceptions make people chase love for all the wrong reasons, it makes them manifest bad, miserable relationships. Here are 10 short lessons you must know.
10 Short Lessons You Need To Learn Before Having A Perfect Relationship:
1. You are already whole.
Most people look for their better half, for that one person who would make them feel whole again. This is because they don’t yet realize they are already whole. Nobody can make you more whole than you can. Learn to be whole by yourself.
2. Your real value comes from your self worth.
Your partner does not determine your value. Nobody determines your value but you. The way you see yourself, think of yourself, speak to yourself, that’s what determines your worth. You don’t need a relationship to find your real value.
3. Be completely comfortable by yourself.
If you can’t be alone with yourself, what makes you think that you can be in a relationship. Deal with your problems before putting them on someone else’s back. The relationships you have are going to reflect all your inner turmoil. So deal with it.
4. Relationships will not bring you happiness.
If you are looking for a relationship in order to finally be happy, you are going to be disappointed. Not because you won’t get into a relationship, you will, but because you’ll realize it does not bring happiness. And you will be more lost than ever.
5. Your purpose is greater than your relationships.
Most people get into a relationship and they forget about their purpose. They put their partner before everything else. It might sound romantic, but it’s not. It’s needy and it comes out of fear, scarcity. Your partner should support your purpose, not overshadow it.
6. Real friends come before romance.
Friendship comes before romance. This does not mean to turn your back to your partner and go out with your friends. It means to honor the friendship you have with your partner, friends, family, more than the romance you get out of the relationship.
7. Real relationships are not a prison.
When you get into a relationship with someone it’s not a start of the game of tolerance. It’s not fighting for your free pass to go out with your friends. Your relationship should not feel like a prison, on the contrary, it should be a platform of trust that liberates you even more.
8. The love between partners is maintained daily.
There is a false idea in society that once you find your special someone you will love each other until the end of time. Love in a relationship is something that’s grown and maintained daily. Getting into a relationship is not a finish, it’s a start of your love.
9. Don’t trade your dreams for a relationship.
Your dreams should be your priority. Everything else it’s just a happening along the journey. Your relationship is not as close as important as your dreams are. You are partners on this journey helping each other follow your dreams while having fun together.
10. You cannot force a loving relationship.
When people love each other you cannot force this love away. It’s the same when this love is gone or when it was not there in the first place. You cannot force a loving relationship, it should develop and unfold naturally. That’s the beauty of it.