Things are neutral, you choose their meaning.
There are two ways to live, either that things happen against you, or for you. In this article we’ll tell you how to get out of victimhood mentality.
What is victimhood mentality? It’s this flawed way of thinking, a mindset where you think the circumstances are against you for some reason.
It gives us an inflated sense of self importance and that’s why it’s so addictive. We think we are so important that the whole world is against us.
We believe that there are limits, people and circumstances preventing us from being happy. It’s someone else’s fault, not ours. This is a fierce prison.
It’s comforting, but it will enslave you indefinitely. When you get out of this mentality it’s when you will actually start to live again and to thrive.
5 Reframes To Get Out Of Victimhood Mentality:
1. You do not lack anything.
One of the biggest false lessons we learn as we grow up is that we need something to make us complete.
The world teaches us through media, propaganda and stories that you need a soulmate, you need to be wealthy, you need a purpose to be happy.
The reality is that you do not need anything. You are complete and whole right here and now as you are reading this.
You don’t need anything. You are enough to be happy, to be yourself, to start becoming who you desire to be. The things you think you need are illusions.
They are a carrot on a stick making you endlessly chase your own tail. So stop. You don’t lack anything to give your 100% right here and right now.
2. Nothing is happening to you.
Majority of people like to think that they are so important that when it starts to rain, for example, it’s because something is against them.
Tiny little beings, on a tiny little land, on a tiny little planet out of billions just in our Galaxy, planet that follows massive, interconnected systems.
And we dare to think that we are so important that all the mechanisms in our Galaxy conspired to create this rain, just so it will mess our hair.
Just so it will make our hair look bad on a day we meet with a client. Really? Do you really think you having a good hair is that much of a threat?
The reality is that nothing happens to you. Things are neutral, but we need to feel important. It’s ok, but see things as happening for you not to you.
3. The world is abundant.
There is one flaw in our mentality that makes us think the world is scarce of things. Scarce of resources, opportunities, things.
In reality, the world is so abundant of things that it’s hard for our mind to really grasp all the available options we have constantly around us.
There are countless opportunities every single second, all around you, countless things you can do and experience, countless resources.
There are so many books you can read, movies you can watch, songs to listen, meals to try, places to visit, art to see, it’s not possible to see 1% of it.
Just think about this. No matter what you want, if you go every single second of every single day doing it, you will experience less than 1% of it.
4. Nobody is stopping you.
If you are like most people you would find countless excuses of why you can’t do the things that you want to do. This is victimhood mentality.
In reality and in all probability, nothing and nobody is actively stopping you to do what you want to do. Think about this. Really do.
You want a better job, who stops you from leaving this one? You want to travel, who stops you? Want to find the love of your life, nobody stops you.
Really. No one does. You can get up, right now, and start walking. Go wherever you want. Right now. ‘But I don’t have…’ find a way, hitchhike.
That’s why you have a mind, to find a way. Instead of using it to complain, use it to find a way. Nobody stops you from living the life that you want.
5. No one owes you anything.
We often have this idea deep inside our subconscious mind that the world owes us something. That we deserve to have what we want to have.
And it’s ok to feel like you deserve to have the things that make you happy, but it’s not ok to think you deserve for something to just serve them to you.
Yeah, you deserve to be successful but you still have to work for it. That’s what deserving means, accepting that you would go the distance.
Feeling that you deserve all those beautiful things and that fact to motivate you to take necessary action. Nobody is responsible to give you anything.
The only one responsible for getting what you want to get is you. Just like everyone else is responsible for themselves. Nobody owes you anything.