Do you know someone who is an overthinker? You probably do. And they are probably really hard to love, maybe even annoying at times.
Overthinkers tend to be perceived as hard people, as people with a lot of principles and rules. They are not easy to be around for many.
But unless you are an overthinker yourself, you don’t really know the constant struggle juggling countless thoughts at once, the surge of worrying thoughts that go in our minds.
Yeah, we might be hard to love. But we don’t mean bad. We don’t mean to be annoying, we don’t mean to be hard to love. We just worry too much, about everything.
We care too intensely for others, we are anxious and afraid, we think all the possible scenarios all at once because we want to feel as we have control over uncertainty.
Our mind goes in overdrive every single time we feel lack of control. There are nights we can barely sleep for things so little others will not even perceive.
We are constant worriers. We worry about the simplest things because we perceive every tiny little detail.
We have an eye for detail, and if there is something even slightly off we can notice it in an instant and we start analyzing it.
We start to analyze it, we overanalyze it, and we create countless scenarios of how it might affect us or the people we love.
We think of what can be, what would be, what would have been, what should we. We think of every single scenario that can actually exist, and countless that are even unreal.
But we cannot perceive what can be real and what cannot be real when we are in this overthinking mode of constant worry.
And all this struggle is just worse when we try to be heard and we mean well, but we end up being annoying for others.
It’s really hard for us when we appear as arrogant or selfish, or even egotistical, when all we mean is well.
It’s just that we worry too freakin much and we want others to see our perspective. But we know that for others this perspective is negative. We know.
We know that we can take a good and positive scenario, filter it through our overthinking prism and paint it all negative, pointing out all the things that could go wrong.
We know we are hard to be around like this, we know it’s annoying for others, but we don’t mean it. We can’t just stop overthinking and think normally. It’s just that we are like this.
We want to be loved too, we want to connect with others. We want others to be happy and we want to contribute to this happiness.
So please try to understand our perspective. Please be patient with us and hear our worries, listen to what we say.
You don’t have to take this perspective for granted, but don’t push us away just because we have an overthinking mind.
All we really want, more than taking our perspective seriously, is genuine human connection.
Sincerely, every overthinker on the planet.