No matter how much you try to find the right partner, inevitably, you end up with someone who is completely wrong for you. You don’t know why you always attract these people. Is there something wrong with you? Are you not meant to be happy in love?
The answer to both of these questions is NO!
This happens to all of us at some point in our lifetime, to some more and to some less than others. When this becomes a pattern, you need to pause and ask why.
First of all, you need to realize that attracting the wrong partner is not a conspiracy against you. The world is not conspiring against your happiness.
In fact, you always attract the things that have the potential to make you the best version of yourself.
There must be a spiritual reason behind this pattern that you need to learn. There is! Not just spiritual, but also a psychological reason you make yourself attracted to these people.
The 4 Main Reasons You Attract Wrong Partners And Complicated Relationships:
1. They are a reflection of something you need to fix within your personality.
Everyone in our life is a reflection of some aspect within our own psyche. They are real people, yes, but what we reflect upon them is our own rendering of who we think they are. This is produced within our own psyche and it is based upon our own inner world.
It’s been widely accepted that opposites tend to attract each other. While others find this a spice for creating balance in the relationship, some underlying reasons may come to the surface.
That is, your partner mirrors the part of you that is flawed and weak. Your partner highlights some aspects of your personality that you need to accept and embrace.
Loving your partner is acknowledging your dark side and accepting the truth that you’re still whole despite those weaknesses and flaws.
As you manage to overcome your shortcomings, you may find that your partner isn’t that difficult to love after all.
2. They bring a karmic lesson.
There are relationships that are destined to bring you wounds because it’s what your soul needs so it can grow.
Regardless of how you and your partner tried your best to make your relationship work, you ended up hurting each other.
There might be things both of you need to improve so you can grow. You may not know it in the beginning but the lessons will start to unravel as you inch your way through.
3. Through your chaotic chemistry something new might be created.
Sometimes the thing that can help you grow does not exist yet. Sometimes you don’t even know what you need, and it’s you that needs to discover and create this thing. The best way to discover something new is to create a chaotic chemical reaction.
Just like Hegel’s theory of antithesis and synthesis where the clash of ideologies creates something new known as synthesis, couples who often clash against each other are most likely to create something new that can benefit the two of them.
As you grind each other through your conflicting personalities and views you might catch a glimpse of a new perspective, one that will give you a different look on things. You might be inspired to do something, to help yourself in a way you haven’t thought of before.
4. Their role is to strengthen your belief system.
Your beliefs are not strengthened by constructing a life that keeps them intact. They are strengthened by clobbering them with opposing opinions and facts. That’s the only way the right beliefs become strongest and the delusions get eradicated.
Dealing with a partner who thinks far differently from you opens your perspective to a whole new world. Challenging your beliefs with different points of view is healthy and it’s crucial for you to evolve your spirit and grow.
However, a relationship that asks you to go far beyond where you even feel unsafe, isn’t worth your love.
Putting back the broken pieces of your heart may take time, but it’s still worth it knowing that even your bad relationships are not against you, but try to help you become the best version of yourself.