Compassion is not the same as pity since feeling pity is feeling sorry for other people’s state of life and connotes a negative meaning.
Compassion is positive, it’s acknowledging their pain but cheering and supporting their greatness, recognizing that we are all in the same team.
You surely know someone who is so compassionate and kind that everybody loves their presence. It’s like when they come, a ray of sunshine comes with them.
Everybody just becomes brighter, there is a spark in their eyes, a positive energy around them.
The world needs more compassion these days, but people seem to be atrophying this muscle.
If you want to become so compassionate that other people love to be around you constantly, here are the habits highly compassionate people do that make everybody like them. You can apply some of these in your lifestyle to build your compassion muscle.
6 Habits Highly Compassionate People Do:
1. Meditate on loving kindness.
Meditation on loving kindness is done by imagining the times others were kind to you, the times you were kind to others, and scenarios that are filled with what loving kindness looks in your opinion. Try to get into that vibration of loving kindness as you meditate on it.
Writing exercises that involve describing a time when you’re feeling a strong bond with others is helpful too.
In doing either of these two practices, you need to give it your all to get better results, like achieving the required amount of time in the meditation exercise. The best time for these practices is early in the morning so you can hold the loving vibration throughout the day.
2. Think what others feel, need and see when you speak with them.
Most of the time we are focused only on ourselves. When we speak with others we don’t want to hear them, we want to be heard.
Highly compassionate people know how to listen to others. They focus on what they feel, need and perceive.
When you actually observe other people you will know how to act to be compassionate. Try to step out of yourself and observe how you feel compassion for others.
You will realize that you are not neglecting yourself when you step away from your own egoistic desires. In fact, you are serving yourself even more by being compassionate to others because there is a part of you in every person you interact with.
When you become aware of this interdependence, you’re more likely to appreciate the efforts and presence of others in human survival.
3. Instead of judging the flaws, start supporting the greatness.
See if you judge others when you see them walking on the street or waiting in line at the supermarket. Look yourself in the mirror and see if the first thoughts that come to your mind are judgmental.
Do you judge others or do you feel compelled to do something to ease them from their sufferings?
Compassionate people focus on other people’s greatness, instead of their flaws, and support it.
The thing is, the way you think about others is the way you think about yourself. If you are judgmental for others, you will be judgmental for yourself. If you tend to mentally support others to develop their true potential, that’s how you will think about yourself.
4. Realize that we are all in this together, daily.
If you find hard to be less judgmental and more compassionate, then you don’t need to do things that can raise your compassion, you need to reframe your perception.
We are naturally compassionate because we know we are all in this together.
But somewhere along the line we forget. We let our egos make us believe that everyone else is out there to get us. But that’s not the truth. Others do the best they can with what they know. We are living in one planet together and we interdepend on each other more than we realize.
If you find hard to be more compassionate than judgmental, you need to remind yourself of this truth.
You can start by becoming aware of how the people worked hard to grow, transport, and sell the food that you put on your table. How the soldiers fought to give you the freedom that you have now. How courageous were your ancestors to make you happen.
You can start to appreciate every single person by realizing that their work and effort adds to the comforts you experience at home.
Another powerful thought is the fact that all of us have been through a lot of suffering in our own way. Every person you see is fighting or has been fighting a hard battle. We all hold pain in ourselves, a pain that’s a part of loving. We are all in this together.
5. Join supportive and compassionate communities.
Getting an outside support keeps you on track, especially when you’re struggling to be more compassionate.
There are many supporting communities in almost every city. Be that for animal support, red cross, communities that help elderly people, communities that help homeless people, even a meditation class can give you the outer kindness you need.
Seeing all these people working together on one bigger goal just so they can spread more kindness, restores your faith in humanity.
We all need a little help to keep the faith in humanity and that’s normal. These communities will give you that faith.
Being kind will become more natural for you if you surround yourself with people who exercise kindness as well. That’s why joining a supporting community is helpful.
Highly compassionate people tend to play almost every day.
They either play a game, dance, work with their hands on a project they are passionate about, or just try new exciting things.
No matter what they do, they put themselves in the play mind frame. That’s what’s important.
Researches have found that play keeps the brain younger and tremendously helps in cases of depression.
When you are in the mind frame of play there are no strict rules that stress you out. Everything is possible and novelty is in front of you. This mind frame forces the brain to create new neural connections and keep your mind flexible.
Having this little mind vacation daily helps you to not take things too seriously. It keeps you in that childlike state where you are loving and compassionate.
Probably the biggest secret that highly compassionate individuals have is exactly this playful mind frame that keeps their hearts childlike and loving.