Some people are too hard on themselves without being aware of it. They believe they are doing okay while constantly listening to the inner critic in their own heads.
A surefire sign that you are too hard on yourself is when asking help from other people isn’t an option for you. You tend to overthink things, you excessively feel bad over a mistake, or tend to worry a lot. All of these signs signal that you are over judging yourself.
While moderate self criticism might be constructive in some cases, this is too much. It may look okay to you, but it’ll bring you unwanted consequences in the long run.
Being constantly judged by your inner critic you are unable to openly be your true self who is sometimes flawed.
To know if you’re that hard on yourself, check out this list and find out if any of these signs are true for you:
14 Signs You Are Too Hard On Yourself
1. You’re your worst critic.
You try your best never to commit a mistake. Once you do, you feel like you don’t measure up and beat yourself up.
Like a broken record, you cannot keep yourself from replaying the scenarios in your head, thinking that things would have been different had you done it differently.
Instead of learning you are your own worst critic who shows no compassion if you commit the same mistake again.
2. You’re kind to others.
When your friend commits the same mistake that you’ve done, you’re not as tough.
Instead, you are very understanding and encouraging, giving them kind words to eliminate their worries.
Though you’re aware of this, you still cannot give the same kindness that you give others to yourself.
3. You keep on saying sorry.
Once you made a mistake, you quickly apologize for it. You even apologize for situations where you haven’t done any mistakes or nothing wrong happens.
Saying “sorry” seems to be a part of who you are because you keep saying it even when you’re already forgiven.
4. You overthink.
Overthinking is your way of life. Your thoughts keep on cycling over the things that took place and the things that may happen in the future.
You create different scenarios from past events, you think of the different outcomes and you worry about scenarios that most likely would never happen.
You keep on wondering whether you did the right thing, you’re doing the right thing, or if you’re able to do the right thing.
5. You don’t feel the need to ask for help.
You find it hard to ask for help from others. You want others to believe that you are competent and resourceful.
Asking for help is a sign of weakness for you because what you want others to see is that you are in control of everything.
6. You’re always eager to help others.
On the contrary, you’re quick to offer a helping hand when others need it. And you don’t even view them as weak or incompetent.
You simply understand that there are times when people need help. Only that you could not accept that fact in yourself.
7. You find difficulty in accepting criticism.
Whether true or not, you find it hard to take criticism. Criticisms consume you.
It’s because you hate making mistakes and are obsessed with doing the right thing only.
Most of the time you want everything you do to be perfect and some people would say you are a perfectionist.
8. You cannot take constructive criticism either.
Though you know constructive criticism can help you improve yourself, accepting it is a struggle for you.
But, despite that inner struggle, you still take those criticisms by heart. You still find it useful and apply it to make yourself better.
This is what tricks you to think that you are not too hard on yourself while you ignore the emotional aspect that those criticisms evoke in you.
9. You find difficulty in receiving compliments too.
While compliments make others happy, it makes you feel awkward.
When caught off guard, it will surprise you as if it is wrongly given to an undeserving person.
What’s more, even if you have a hard time receiving compliments, you’re eager to give it to others.
10. You hate making mistakes.
Once you commit a mistake, it is embedded in your brain and becomes a part of you. It’s really hard for you to let go of it even after you learn the lesson.
Though you know making mistakes is part of life, you hate making one.
It’s because once you do, you overthink of the consequences your mistakes have on others. This makes you guilty. And guilt gives additional reasons for your inner critic to judge you.
11. You guard your emotions.
You are very good in guarding your emotions. You don’t allow others in because you don’t want to be seen as delicate, vulnerable, or emotional.
You try as much as you can to maintain a strong personality, though inside you are tearing apart.
12. You’re always afraid of not measuring up.
You always find a flaw in yourself, your life, and your looks. It’s like the other person is always a better kind of a being.
Because you know your flaws enough, you constantly compare your worst side with the others’ best side.
You constantly worry of not measuring up, despite knowing that no one is ever perfect.
13. You want more from life.
You are hard on yourself because you desire greatness. Your goals revolve in perfection and ultimate success.
By this, anything that is less is unacceptable. You don’t give yourself a chance to be wrong and get better.
14. You work very, very hard.
You are a hard worker and do anything it takes to get the things done.
You don’t quit until the job is done or done it really, really well. And you don’t stop until you are sure that your work is impeccable and worthy.
Though you greatly desire for success, being hard on yourself can be negative for the quality of the life you live.
Stop being your own dictator!
Even though we need to have a small dose of self criticism to know what and where we need to improve, one needs to have an ample amount of self-love and self-esteem to be both truly successful and happy.
So stop being so hard on yourself. Show yourself love and kindness because you deserve it! You’ve been through a lot!
Nurture your heart and honor your emotions! Feel what you feel without explaining yourself why!
Don’t turn your back on yourself every time you make a mistake. That’s when you need your support the most!
In the end, how much you enjoyed your life is what matters the most!